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Thursday, June 28, 2007

Really hate working at Jurong Island cause i really hate rushing for the stupid transport which comes so early. Lim bu already not enough sleep liao still must wake up so early to rush for the transport which won't wait.

I also hate 1 of the site manager. She damn kaypo. Always say she's not my supervisor & thus cannot watch over what i do but she's always the 1 having something to say & thus making the most noise. He initials are KBL. I nicknamed her Kao Bei Lan. Hehehe.

Although i may dislike working here but i did learn alot of new things. I've seen a few nationalities passport & i find Myanmar's passport the cutest. It seems that there is a rule that says all guys must dress smartly with ties when taking photos for the passport.

They look so smart you would think they are salesman or something but no. They are here as electricians. I wonder what the girls there look like & how they dress for their photos in the passport. Do you wonder too?

The funniest thing is that they have this particular column named as distinguished marks. Under that column there are things like mole on left temper, scar on nose, mole on chest, etc etc. blah blah.. You get the drift.

It makes me wonder why Singapore don't have this kind of thing just in case something happen to us overseas & they can use this to recognise us. Cool right? If only i'm the officer who writes all this then fatso kor's will be written as man with breast.

HAHAHA!

For mine, i'll write a hole in the arse. What will yours be? Tell me ok? Not funny don't say. I only allow humourous things on my blog. Think of a few & let me know leh.

Though their passports might be cute but i totally hate their name cause i can nvr ever pronounce it. How the hell do you pronounce kyaw or phyo or naing or hlaing or even htike? WTF? There are so many others. I gave up eventually. Lucky there's always employee number which i can use.

Indian names are so much better. AT least, they are in so called proper english. There was one Bangladeshi name i came across which i found it difficult to pronounce without causing embarassment to myself. The name is Fakir.

So the 1st thing that came to my mind is ......... ya, you know what la. Don't tell me you nvr thought of it. I don't understand why people got such weird name. Fakir. Funny name. Imagine if everyone have the same thinking as me.

Wahahaha... So funny hor? I can't imagine it. Everybody calling you fakir with the pronounciation as fucker. Their conversation with everybody would be funny but of cause his name not really pronounce that way la.

Daddy is coming home today for a short 4 days to renew his work permit & i happen to have tickets to this coming saturday's NDP rehearsal. At least i still get to see NDP live & get goodie bags so it doesn't matter if it's not the actual 1.

The 1st NDP on waters. Even if given me free tickets for the actual show i wouldn't want to go. I would be siao to be squeezing with hundreds & thousands of kiasu, smelly, sweaty Singaporeans.

Rehearsal would be good enough. I can relax & watch the actual 1 at home lying comfortably on my bed sipping a nice cold can of Nescafe.

That's life!

Friday, June 22, 2007

I am so damn pissed off yesterday. I went down for dinner with my mother-in-law & deardear. There were 2 guys sitting next to us which is a non-smoking area & started smoking.

I don't know what went into deardear but he got up & went to told the guy that he is not allowed to smoke there. Not as if there is no place in the smoking area.

The guy not only don't apologise yet he stare at deardear & started scolding him in vulgar languages. WTF? How can scold my deardear like that? So damn fucking angry can?

After that, 1 of the guy went to the toilet & when he came back, he purposely push the chair & it hit me. I have a good mind to smash him with the chair & pour my claypot noodles(still boiling hot) onto his bloody head. FUCK HIM!!

Don't understand why got barbarians like that. So ugly & so crude. Want scold people also must see whose territory he is standing in. I have been a resident here for more than 10 years. Call police come then we see who is right or wrong la.

If he is smart enough to use internet & happen to come across my blog, it's you asshole i'm talking abt. Not happy come whack me la. Bastard! Fucking son-of-a-bitch!

Recently, i'm very unhappy because it's very simple. Unhappy things are happening around me. I hate guys who are irresponsible especially my own friends.

Recently again, i have a friend & i call him boon. No. I don't think i call him a friend now. He's not my friend anymore. He is a bastard.

This bloody bastard made a 18 yr old girl pregnant & the girl now happens to be my friend/sis. He not only don't take care of her but still go fooling around.

When the girl decides to go for abortion & ask him for money, he says that he is not sure if the baby is his. Chee bye right?

Not only is he a fucking son-of-a-bitch, he is also a stingy bastard. Only want play around but don't want take responsibility. To think i still friends with him for so long.

FUCKERS!!!

What do some of you guys take us girls for? Can like that simply play play then clean your smelly ass & fuck off?

Dare to play but don't dare to take up the responsibility? Not the ways of a MAN at all. Dare to play then dare to be responsible la.

Phui!

I look down on guys like this. All bo lan jiao bo lan pa. Better off dead la. Throw all the other mens face & dignity away. Most guys would love to kill them.

Even most the ah bengs are better than them. Play liao got prob, they face it like a man & take up the responsibility because they got balls.

I nvr expected boon to be serious in relationship after knowing him for near to ten years. His gf is forever changing & he always have more than 2 gfs at once.

But i nvr expected him to be so irresponsible & say those kind of nasty things. What a insult! I wanna cut off his balls & penis. He not a man & thus not allowed to have balls & penis.

What is so good abt him? He's not good looking, he's fat, barbaric & owns a head bigger than normal humans but he got brains like pea size or even smaller.

From what i know is that girls fall for him because he is a sweet talker which i think is total bullshit. All i ever heard from him is blowing the big trumpet(dua pao sian).

Those girls must be either really blind or extremely stupid. He used to go after me in the past like ten years ago when i got to know him. He tried sweet talking but i only found it disgusting.

I felt pretty lucky that i did not accepted him cause i don't like fat, ugly & younger than me guys. I hate sweet talking cause i find them not very sincere & extremely fake like they just wanna go to the bed with me.

I only like sweet nothings from the guy i love & i only go for serious, sincere & humourous guys. I'm pretty glad that my friend/sis left him for good cause she can definitely find somebody than him.

It's just a pity that she's got his germs in her but it's ok. You will meet the right guy that truly love you. Mei, don't feel too sad ok?

Too bad i don't have his photo. Arbo i will post it up so that every girl who come across my blog can beware of him. I can only say that his trademark is that big head of his. Very easy to recognise. Afterall, how many ugly bigheads we have in Singapore?

What do you guys have to say abt this? Leave comments on how you would teach this guy a painful lesson.

Sunday, June 17, 2007

This post to dedicated to my father & all other fathers out there.

Happy Father's Day!!!

Papa, we mayb naughty at times. We may not always listen to you. Though you spoil us & thus turning me into a spoilt brat but it's ok. It mayb your responsibility to teach BUT it's also our responsibility to learn. Nothing will be too late as long we still willing to learn. Thanks for not giving up on us no matter what happens. I'm sincerely grateful to you for what i have become today. Without you, we will not be here at all. We will always miss you & we will always love you. Stay happy always.

Your Beloved Daughter
Sheila

Monday, June 11, 2007

I think i gotta stop writing sad things. This is becoming a very gloomy blog. Somehow, my readership went up during this period of time.

You guys are sadistic or what? Like to read sad things & build your happiness on other people's misery? Just kidding so don't get offended. It's lame but it beats feeling sad all the time right?

I know some of you guys are really concerned about me la. I'm very happy. Thanks alot! I'm a lucky girl. I have a huge bunch of good friends who really care.

Life is not that bad huh?

Have you guys ever try throwing all your worries & troubles 1 side for a moment, sit in a corner & watch the sunrise? It's fantastic i tell you.

As the train goes by in front of you, it's actually not that noisy. It's kinda like a beautiful scene. The orangy light with the surroundings of trees, clouds & blue blue sky with birds flying across it. It's just like a painting.

You know i start to sound like as though i'm dying soon. Of cause i'm not dying soon. I have a goal yet to accomplish. Before that, i will not allow myself to fall.

You guys get the picture la hor? I did not really sit in a corner & watch that happen la. Just that on my way to work sitting quietly in the transport, i happen to see that scene.

Life is beautiful.

Everybody has got their own problems be it big or small. We may have problems at work, problems at home, problems at relationships, problems with money etc etc etc... It's a nvr-ending cycle in life.

What i meant to say is that there are no problems that cannot be solved. It's just a matter of perspective & how you handle the situation.

When there's a will, there's a way.

I nvr used to believe in all this saying but things happen & change my mindset abt it. I start to believe & through my own actions, i see things happen right before my eyes.

Think before you act.

I think there must be a reason why there are all this sort of sayings. Alot of things went through my mind everytime i sit in a corner not thinking of anything.

There comes a time when we must all learn to grow up. I stop crying like a small kid & throwing tantrums all the time. My temper cool down alot. I'm like a volcano that is going to sleep.

There are definitely times that i wake up but mayb just a mild eruption rather than the huge 1 i used to have killing everyone around me.

I start to do more thinking than talking. I always think before i start shouting. By the time i finish thinking i would have cooled down.

Backtrack abit. Like i said, no problems cannot be solved unless you don't want it solved. Try cooling down & clear your mind before you start thinking.

When you do things with a clearer mind, you can see a bigger picture of it & realise that things are not as difficult as you thought it is.

Try doing some puzzle games like sudoku the next time you are feeling fustrated. You'll realise that you are unable to solve it because your mind is in a mess.

Try to calm down, you start seeing the bigger picture & voila! You manage to solve the puzzle & by then, you would have cooled down alot.

I feel very old all of a sudden. Well... Don't worry my dear friends. I'm still the old lala who is always full of fun, lame jokes & crazy most of the time.

Just that i can think better when it comes to serious matters which there will nvr be when i'm having fun with my friends yeah?

Now i wanna complain. Let out some fustrations.

It's such a pain working at Jurong Island. No difference from going to JB except it's slightly faster. Rush for transport, reach checkpoint. get down, scan pass & rush for transport again.

I'm like trapped in a jail. Nowhere to go during lunchtime. Going out & coming back is a hassle & i can nvr be back in time.

Food sucks big time! I think even army & jail serve better food than the stupid canteen here. Only have mixed rice. Vegetables too oily, chicken too salty & drinks limited.

You guessed correctly! NO NESCAFE!!! How can? Lim bu going to die in there soon. See the food also no appetite. Want vomit instead.

Think i better start bringing cup noodles & ta pau my own food there. Thought of bringing cans & cans of coffee there but pantry too far from office. Scared people take plus too heavy.

I'm gotta stay there for a month cause of the stupid contract i sign. After that, i'll leave that deserted polluted air place for good.

Ok. I'm done complaining. Want to go orh orh le. Wow! Look at that. What a long entry i've wrote. This should make up for the lack of updates.

Wednesday, June 6, 2007

I wanna say thanks to you guys out there who showed concern to me regarding my marriage. I'm sorry if i didn't reply some of you guys sms. I just wanted to be alone.

In times like this, it is the support that you people give that keeps me going stronger everyday. I don't know what i will do without all the support.

I've decided not to give up. I will carry on. I believe thru my own efforts i can 1 day touch his heart & make him come back to my side.

It has been a painful lesson learnt & i will not commit the same mistakes again. I hope you guys out there who read my blog learn something from it too.

Do not take the person beside you for granted. You nvr know when he/she will just disappear 1 day & nvr come back. Treasure whatever you have.

All humans make mistakes. The most important thing is that we admit our mistakes & learn from it. It is nvr too late to turn back.

In life, we are learning new things everyday & we will continue learning till the day we die. Different people learn things at different pace so be understanding.

Every once in awhile, i'll share in here what i've learnt in my life & what can be done to maintain a happy marriage/relationship.

It can be used as a reminder for myself. My life is just beginning & i have to carry on. Hope you guys can continue to support me. It really means alot to me.

If you have anything to share regarding relationships or basically anything to do in our daily lives, do share! So everyone can learn something out of it.

I would love to learn more. It's not just abt boy girl relationships but also people to people relationships. You do not take your friends for granted too.

Please write whatever you have to share in the comments so everybody can go read it.

Monday, June 4, 2007

Last sat is the worst day in my life. I have nvr ever expect that he will 1 day tell me in my face that he doesn't love me anymore.

He said it was a mistake to marry me & now he wants to divorce me. It has been 3 days. I still cannot believe what he said is true.

I can still feel the pain in my heart so it's not just a bad dream. Everything is real. It's happening in my life. That was the last thing i expected to hear from him.

I don't know what to do. I don't know how to react. I only know i love him too much to let go. I thought it was the same for him. I nvr expect him to let go of me so easily.

I wish everything is just a bad dream but the pain lingers in my heart & it's not going away. I wish i can go back to the past to the deardear who will nvr say this things to me.

He told me on our wedding day that he is going to bring me away from all the troubles & give me happiness but now it's not coming true.

He told me that no matter what happens, we will always be together. We will nvr ever divorce. He said there will be no divorce at the present & in the future.

I know he's been hurt badly but i'm also hurt. Why can't things be simple? I only want us to be like in the past. I swear i will nvr ever hurt him again.

I really love him with all my heart. Why can he be so cruel & heartless to say that he don't love me anymore? It's not true. I refuse to believe that it's true.

If i was given a chance to go back to the past, i will be the nicest gf & wife he will ever have. I will treat him with utmost respect & serve him well.

If only, i can be given this chance to go back which is nvr ever coming into my life. The chance has been given once & will not come back again.

He has once again open another wound in me. I do not know how long it will take to heal this time. Mayb it will remain open for the rest of my life.
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