Sunday, October 28, 2007

Updates!

Apart from my cousin's wedding last saturday, handing in my resignation letter on monday, seeing William So live this friday & going to my other cousin's house warming yesterday, this week has been a rather shitty week for me.

Things happen & make me really unhappy. Don't wanna say abt it anymore. Too tired of everything that has been going on non-stop since i was young.

Let's talk abt more happy things. 1st up is my cousin's wedding. I never thought i would see her get married. I'm not trying to be mean but since young, i've been wondering when she'll actually get married.

She's much older than me but i have never seen her have a boyfriend until recent years. She finally found her happiness. I'm happy for her.

No photos because my stupid Nokia 7390 broke down on me once again. Need to get a new phone. Anybody have any good recommendation? Let me know please.

I finally hand in my letter & ask for early release. Really can't stand working there anymore. Tomorrow is my last day le. Woohoo! So happy. Got farewell lunch some more. Teppanyaki! Hehehe...

Went to a disco pub called Lunar located at Clarke Quay to see William So performing. The disco has got live band but is chinese la & in the middle also got play english song for you to dance la. Quite a nice place.

That night they invited William So to perform & it's fucking full house lor. We book table liao but got this 1 bunch of people in front of us. Purposely block my view. Really feel like smacking them.

Lucky Quan Kai's step father Uncle Patrick's(nice uncle) friend know the people there well & so we get to move the the middle & have an even clearer view.

We waited till abt 12.30am before William So came out. He sang abt 6-7 songs before he left. Thereafter, people started to leave. So realistic. I was also 1 of them. Haha!

Again, no photos cause of the damn phone & i've got no money to buy a digital cam. My sister did took some with her phone but have yet to get it from her. Anyway, not very clear also because of the lightings there.

I now officially announce that i'm a William So fan. He is so damn cool lor & i like his trademark of collecting spectacles. I think all his spectacles cost alot. If i have the kind of money, i'll also start a hobby like this. I think deardear going to faint liao. Hahaha!

Went to my cousin's, the father of my 2 xin gan bao bei niece's house warming. Their house is nicely done up & they have got alot of nice accessories which are gifts from close friends. So good leh.

Such a coincidence that deardear's CSM was also there. His wife is the friend of my cousin's wife, Carol's friend.

Spent pretty much the whole day playing with the kids. They are just so adorable. Might be bringing them out this sunday. See they free anot. Lol... Bring kids out still must see they free anot. Bo bian... Must see the parents got any plans anot lor.

Woke up really early this morning just to have breakfast at Tiong Bahru Market with my in-laws. Not bad actually la.

Very long never eat the food there liao. Brings back alot of memories when i was still young. My parents will often bring me there to eat & my favourite is the porridge & raw fish.

Wanted to buy tortoise to keep de but my father-in-law scold me. He say i never take care of my pets de. I had 5 hermit crabs & all 5 died. Not my fault what.

What does that old fart(joking) know? I got feed them & give them water but don't know why still will die. He talk until like i murderer like that. Very shit lor.

How can condemn me just like this? I got keep tortoise before de. I keep until the tortoise grow very big then set it free at Xiao Guilin.

I don't care. I must get my tortoise & prove it to him that i can jolly well take care of them.

I DON'T CARE!!!

Thursday, October 18, 2007

Cheated!

Feel so cheated by the company i'm working for now. It was suppose to be data entry because that is what they told me.

Who ever heard of accounts dept hiring data entry? I'm more like an accounts assistant now & they are only paying me a measly 1000 bucks.

How freaking pathetic is that? I feel so fucking cheated lor.

Initially, i thought to myself say nevermind la. Got work better than nothing. Try 1st & see how lor but who knows their expectations getting higher & higher everyday. Want do appraisal on my performance some more.

For christ sake! I'm only a temp staff there & they don't exactly pay me alot. Why must yao qiu duo duo? Too much lor.

It's like in a market. Buy fish bargain half price liao still extra half kilo of prawns free. Tai guo fen le!

Want tender resignation letter but no chance as i haven't been to work for the past few days. Got a very bad sunburnt back.

Can't sleep on any position i like. Skin gets irritated easily so i can't sleep with clothes on either. Very very bad. It's really really red like lobster lor.

Now better le. Not so pain but very fucking itchy. Can't scratch. So xinku. I swear i never ever go under the sun like this again without sunblock.

Next time i'll just lay quietly in my hammock & sleep. May tomorrow be a better day.

Tuesday, October 9, 2007

Sickening!

You know how sickening it is when everything you do seems to be wrong? Nothing is right. Everybody just pushes the bloody blame to you.

What the hell is wrong? What did i do to deserve this kinda treatment from others? Just because you are angry doesn't mean you can anyhow scold people right?

Really feel very depressed. I nvr like to quarrel with good friends & family members but why is it when i'm kind to them, they take me for granted?

I really don't understand the human world anymore. Mayb i come from another planet that makes me vulnerable to the humans on earth.

Mayb i shouldn't be here at all or mayb i should leave the family which i thought i belong to.

Mayb i should just fucking die! Die! Die! Die!

Sorry for the gibberish. I'm just too damn depressed at the moment. Goodbye my dear friends...

Thursday, October 4, 2007

Sometimes i wish i never had so much hatred in me & that i'm not such a evil & mean person. Hatred makes me miserable. I never like to bear hatred against others. I always forgive & forget.

So why is it that i still bear some hatred towards certain people?

I may say things that hurt people & especially people i don't like but still i have friends who like me. They feel that i'm straight forward which i am.

I don't feel the need to hide anything. I may have offended some people in the process & so be it. Rather than i hide the truth & make myself miserable.

That's how i am. People who can accept it are my true friends. Only true friends tell the truth. I hate to hide things. I don't like secrets & i absolutely hate people lying to me.

Lie straight in my face some more. Treat me like idiot or what? I'm no idiot & i'm not stupid. I can always tell. Nothing lies hidden away from me.

I’m always fair to all my friends. Even if they once betrayed me but i still forgive them. I always stay loyal to my friends. I’m always there for them. But there will people that i just dislike & can never be friends.

People who were once my friends can become my enemy overnight or in an instant because of something they did which pisses me off badly. I don’t hate people for no reason.

Yes. I may dislike a person for no reason just because i don’t like they way they look & most of the time i’m glad they are not my friends.

Just call it an instinct of mine. I just can tell at a look from a person’s face if he/she is worthy of my friendship but i don’t hate for no reason.

I used to have so many friends. We used to just have fun hanging out with one another going to Orchard or Sentosa. Where did those happy days went to? Why are they gone? What happened to us in between those happy times till now?

Why did they still choose to do things to piss me off even after so many times i tell them not to? Why did they choose to give up this precious friendship so easily when I treat my friends as the chosen ones?

My friendship does not come by easily. It’s not easy to be my friend. Of course everyone can choose to be or not to be my friend. I don’t force & likewise, i choose my friends carefully. Not everyone can be my friend just because they want to.

I’m not saying that i’m all high & mighty. I'm not a snoobish person & i hate people who are like this. Think they so good & precious. Read between the lines ok? I’m just like this. It’s merely the characteristics of a Cancer & Leo i think. It’s as though i’ve got a split personality.

Anyway, it’s not really important to me that those days come back. This thought just strike me out of nowhere & i started to ponder upon it.

Life sucks badly & life can also be wonderful.
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