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Tuesday, November 17, 2009

Updates!

Okay. I'm back again. Somebody is complaining that i don't blog often enough. Very kanasai. Never write blog also must get scolding.

I see that he's a good friend by accompanying me when i'm down and lending his shoulder when i cry then i write now so he can read. Song bo? Haha..

Man.. I think i really too long never write blog until now i'm using all sorts of language. This has to stop. I must go back to my perfect English writing.

Hmmmm.. What shall i blog about? All i have to say are sad things. People who know me know what kind of mum i have right?

Just yesterday, she told me to get out of the house again which is really heart breaking. I can tolerate anybody outside whom i don't care about.

They can scold me, say things about me or even laugh at me but when people i care say nasty things to me, it is really hurting.

Sometimes i don't know if i hate my mum more than i love her. How much more of her nonsense can i tolerate for the love i have for her?

I was at the rate of bursting out in tears when i called my dad. I can tell that he too has received certain amounts of stress from my mum because he actually cried over the phone which totally broke my heart.

I sense that my dad is facing some problems on his side but he refuse to tell me what is going on. He said i can't help him as well.

I know he doesn't want me to worry but doesn't he know that by not telling me anything will make me worry more?

I really feel so useless. I can't do anything right. I feel really lost. What am i suppose to do now? What can i do? I'm really too tired with all the things that is going on around me.

I'm frustrated enough that i can't find a full time job. Why is my mum giving us so much shit? I really don't understand. Does she hate us so much?

I don't wanna think so much anymore. I had enough. If moving out is what she wants me to do and if it makes her happier then i will move out the moment i find a job.

In fact, i have an interview tomorrow morning. I seriously hope i can get that job and out of the house i leave. Wish me luck!

Sunday, November 8, 2009

I'm back!

Hi all! It's been a long time since i blogged. It's not that i don't care about this blog anymore. I've been giving myself lots of excuses that i don't have time to blog.

In fact, i've been going out a lot with lots of newfound friends. Life has been good for me even though i have already left my ex company.

Well now.. Where do i start? I really have no idea what to say. A lot has happened within this 3 months. Some good some bad.

Alright. I'm now wasting my life away working part time in a pub for the time being while looking for another full time day job.

It ain't that bad actually. Working there has let me improve my drinking skills and make many friends. They are all really fun and my boss is good to me too but i know i can't stay there for long. It's not exactly a proper career.

Been single for a long time though there are now people going after me but i did not take a step further other than just being friends.

Maybe i have fear of being hurt again or i really don't know what it is like to fall in love anymore. I do not feel love at all. I'm just numb to it.

What's important is that i know i will always have a bunch of good friends around me no matter what happens and i can always depend on them.

Sighz.. Ok la. Nothing much to say for the time being. I shall update real soon again. Cya guys!
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