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Tuesday, November 17, 2009

Updates!

Okay. I'm back again. Somebody is complaining that i don't blog often enough. Very kanasai. Never write blog also must get scolding.

I see that he's a good friend by accompanying me when i'm down and lending his shoulder when i cry then i write now so he can read. Song bo? Haha..

Man.. I think i really too long never write blog until now i'm using all sorts of language. This has to stop. I must go back to my perfect English writing.

Hmmmm.. What shall i blog about? All i have to say are sad things. People who know me know what kind of mum i have right?

Just yesterday, she told me to get out of the house again which is really heart breaking. I can tolerate anybody outside whom i don't care about.

They can scold me, say things about me or even laugh at me but when people i care say nasty things to me, it is really hurting.

Sometimes i don't know if i hate my mum more than i love her. How much more of her nonsense can i tolerate for the love i have for her?

I was at the rate of bursting out in tears when i called my dad. I can tell that he too has received certain amounts of stress from my mum because he actually cried over the phone which totally broke my heart.

I sense that my dad is facing some problems on his side but he refuse to tell me what is going on. He said i can't help him as well.

I know he doesn't want me to worry but doesn't he know that by not telling me anything will make me worry more?

I really feel so useless. I can't do anything right. I feel really lost. What am i suppose to do now? What can i do? I'm really too tired with all the things that is going on around me.

I'm frustrated enough that i can't find a full time job. Why is my mum giving us so much shit? I really don't understand. Does she hate us so much?

I don't wanna think so much anymore. I had enough. If moving out is what she wants me to do and if it makes her happier then i will move out the moment i find a job.

In fact, i have an interview tomorrow morning. I seriously hope i can get that job and out of the house i leave. Wish me luck!

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