Showing posts from 2008

Ultimate Stress...

Lately, alot has been happening at home. It had been a very unhappy Christmas.

I have lots of mixed feelings within me. Sad, disappointed, shocked, betrayal, cheated, denial.

All i wanted was someone close to me who can understand me and go thru all this trials of tough times with me but apparently, there is none.

I wanna end all this unhappiness once and for all but it's not within my means to do so.

Sometimes i wonder why i have to go thru all this unneccessary mental stress. It's very unhealthy for me.

I only have 1 answer to that. I have to learn to be strong so as to overcome everything. Instead of mentally breaking down, i become stronger.

I believe that my happiness is out there waiting for me. I have to fight to get out from the maze of unhappiness and my happiness will be there waiting for me.

The day will come. I just have to endure for now. God will give me my well deserved happiness.

Merry Christmas!!!

Let's Sing together everybody~~~~
Latest Christmas carol for 2008..

You'd better watch out
You'd better not cry
You'd better keep cash
I'm telling you why:
Recession is coming to town.
It's hitting you once,
It's hitting you twice
It doesn't care if you've been careful and wise Recession is coming to town
It's worthless if you've got shares
It's worthless if you've got bonds
It's safe when you've got cash in hand
So keep cash for goodness sake, HEY
You'd better watch out
You'd better not cry
You'd better keep cash
I'm telling you why:
Recession is coming to town!
Finance products are confusing
Finance products are so vague
The banks make you bear the cost of risk So keep out for goodness sake, OH
You'd better watch out
You'd better not cry
You'd better keep cash
I'm telling you why:
Recession is coming to town !

Holiday Mood..

Christmas is just round the corner. I'm already in the holiday mood but i'm not really that excited abt Christmas celebration.

Many things has been going on around me and trapping me in a small space till i can't breath at all.

I feel so miserable at times but nobody knows. I'm only good at doing my job well and keeping things to myself.

I know that certain memories can only be kept in my heart. Those memories are in the past and will never come back again.

All that is left are just lies. Blatant lies and fake promises. Beautiful things just don't last long enough for you to enjoy.

In a snap of the finger and it's gone. *Poof!* Just like this and we are thrown back into reality which is harsh and realistic.

It's a cruel world out there. I can only find peace in God's presence. Only HE can give me the strength to carry on.

I'm so afraid of losing my mind or i might have really lost it that i actually bought a hamster for my brother when he requested it.


Horrible experience

Last night on my way home, i encounter a horrible experience. A malay guy walk up towards me and ask me where i'm going.

He was smiling pervertly to me. I ignored him and just continue walking feeling abit scared and thinking if i should look for help.

I never expected that he would actually walk 1 big round just to catch me at the entrance of the lift grinning pervertly at me again.

I really got a nasty shock to see him there but i was really lucky as there's a auntie there already waiting for a lift.

That stupid pervert malay guy walk away in disappointment. I quickly went into the lift with the auntie and told her what happened.

She said i was really lucky that she too just got back and she also said that she have never seen this guy around before.

I thank God and the auntie for saving me in time. If it was just me and the guy, who would have known what would happen.

It really freaked me out totally bringing back alot of bad memories of the past when i was young.

I was shivering wh…


Sorry for not blogging for such a long time. Don't feel like blogging at all.

Might be ignoring this blog for an even longer period of time till i get my things settled.

Alot is going through my mind and i'm having a hell lot of mixed emotions right now. I feel sad, angry, dejected and confused.

I'm at the point of breaking out into tears soon. I'm really just a simple girl who just wants to be happy. Why do i have to suffer all this mental torture?

I've been thinking of doing something but i'm still holding back. I don't know what is wrong with me.

I only know that things are gonna turn very ugly but that's the only way i can bring peace to myself.

I'm not superwoman. I'm human and i have feelings. People just keep doing things to hurt me. I keep seeing things that i don't wanna see.

I don't wanna fall back into darkness again but here i am struggling for my life and my own happiness all by myself.

There's no one to help me. All alone by my…

No time...

Bah! I thought i would have more time to relax after the Loo Campaign organised by the World Restroom Association but i seem to get more and more busy.

So many month end reports to do, load photos, attend course and 1 particular new sales person is irritating the shit out of me not to mention the usual rubbish coming from Branch Support.

I swear i will not Ms Nice Lady anymore if she pisses me off 1 more time. Don't understand how an adult woman like her can act like that with that kind of behaviour.

Don't wanna talk about her right now. Let me have a nice weekend for once. I'm already having enough stress.

My handphone is a total goner. Even Sony Ericsson can't save my phone. What luck! So it's time for me to burn a hole in my pocket again.

The only good thing is that my pimples are getting slightly better though it's still pretty red and i think the scars are gonna stay awhile.

I also bought a new camera and i love it so much!!! It's the Canon PowerShot E1 and …

I'm busted!

It had been a really lousy week for me. I certainly hope this week will get better.

1st, i had the school calling me to tell me that there wasn't enough student for the course i'm taking and therefore there will be no class.

I was really upset. I almost cried. I have been looking forward to the classes and as the date comes nearer, they say no class.

I felt really lost. The next intake is next year March. I don't know if i can wait that long. Maybe i'll look out for other schools.

Remember that 2 years ago i was knocked down by a vehicle in Indonesia? Recently, i fell down the stairs, knock my head and was admitted to the hospital.

I've heard that people die a few months later after they knocked their head. I wonder if i'm 1 of them. I hope not. Sounds abit scary.

I seem to be very prone to accidents huh? If my dad was a millionaire, i would employ bodyguards to follow me everywhere i go.

Just a dream... I'll probably marry a billionaire. Lol... Better start takin…



No time to blog. There's an upcoming event organised by the Restroom organization and our company is 1 of the sponsors.

It's called the Loo Campaign and it will be held at the Singapore Zoo. We also have a booth there to promote our products.

The whole team will be there to educate the public on our hygiene services. Eversince i started working here, i've been paying alot of attention to my personal hygiene.

Now i know how important it to wash our hands properly and sanitizations. There are so many germs around us and we never really pay any attention to it.

I hope i don't become those people who are so extreme about cleanliness. Lol.. Not that they are bad la but too extreme also not very good ba.

We humans have to live with abit of dirt else our immune system won't work properly.

Ok. Enough of that. My main purpose is to say that i'll probably have more time to blog after the event.

Been working around the clock non-stop. Too many things to settle and to…


Today we had the 1st meeting with the new manager, Jaya on board. The meeting lasted for nearly half a day with lots of new issues.

My sales people had their share of complains on how much suffering we had with the unsupportive help of branch support.

At the same time, he also implemented alot of things on me which Jimmy never did in the past because he knows it's gonna be tough on me.

Jaya being totally new to our industry of cause had no idea. Apparently, it was the directive from our dear GM.

I'm gonna be overloaded soon but still, i had to get on with it. I'll try it for a month or so to see how well i can deal with it.

I wanna see how far i can stretch my limits. He say will employ an assistant for me but whether the headcount will be approved is still another thing.

I see darkness ahead of me. Gonna be totally engulfed by it soon. My life sucks but at least i'm proven to be capable of handling things well. =)

He initially suggested me to join the sales as a BDE (Busines…

Happy Halloween!

Sorry for the lack of updates.

Went out on Deepavali with my sis and khai. We went to watch movie, The Coffin. What can i say? Most lame thai horror show i've ever watched.

Been really busy with work. Was to give admin training on wednesday on our system and necessary paperwork to new staff so was busy preparing the materials.

So far working here, 3 colleagues has already left us so here comes new staff and thanks to Jimmy, i had to give the training.

3 ladies and Jaya, the man who is taking over Jimmy's position aka my future manager. I think i really sucks at teaching.

1 to 1 training i'm still ok la but teaching so many people at the same time in conference room is seriously not my forte.

I get stucked with words at times. I've only seen Jimmy do such trainings but never expect that he will throw me go die like this.

Wahahahaha! Actually not a bad experience la. Since i know my stuff well and Jimmy has enough trust in me to do a good job i should be proud ba.

I should share…

A super lousy day

Yippee! I finally got my internet connection back but it came at a very heavy price.

Yesterday i was on leave so i went down to orchard to apply internet since i have a friend working there, but i didn't meet him at all cause he went out to do some business. His colleague attended to me instead.

I was soooooo happy that they actually provide cash and carry which means i don't have to wait for them to deliver. I just carry the modem home and plug in myself.

It was a pretty hot day so i thought of sitting down someplace and have a drink.

I was walking along the pavement and as you guys know that on top of the drain, there's always a metal plate.

Who would expect the metal plate to give way? I step on 1 that did and my whole leg went into the drain.

I had 1 hand carrying my bag and another hand holding on to the modem in a plastic bag. Was kinda heavy.

I was lucky not to fall face flat into the drain. I did not sustain any injuries but i did sort of sprain my ankle a little and stre…

Lousy Week...

It has been a really lousy week for me. On monday, i was called into the GM office and got reprimanded for nothing.

My internet has been cut off because the contract ended. Very sickening. Lots of work to do even when i'm at home but can't access my email.

My wisdom tooth is giving me lots of pain since last week. Arghhhhh!!!!

Yesterday during meeting, my manager announce a really bad news to us. He is being taken down by the GM to the R&D department with effect on 1st Nov.

Another guy from drainage department will be promoted as our manager. I think it was a result of my manager fighting too hard for us.

It really came as a shocking news to me. Was unable to accept it. It feels as though my mum is telling me my dad is not my real dad that kind of feeling.

Ya. I know it's abit exaggerating la but i really feel very sad lor. I will miss my boss la. I couldn't help but weep like a small kid. Why is the GM so against us?

We are afterall the only department generating revenue…

Life is so far so good...

Beyond is coming to town again. The last i saw of them was like 2 years back. I'm a huge fan of theirs and was very sad when the lead singer died in a freak accident.

I badly wanna go see them again but i don't think i should spend the money like this plus this time round, it's only 2 of them though my favourite drummer is coming.

Sighz... Growing up is torturing. There are so many things you need to learn and always have to think twice about a certain decision but i guess that's life.

I receive my letter of acceptance loh. Tomorrow go make payment to make sure i get a place 1st. So happy... Can't wait for my course to start.

I realise that i don't really blog much about my job. Well... I think i just didn't know what to say. Work is good. My boss is also good. Colleagues good.

My boss brings me out when i request to see a particular job done cause i'm interested to know more about our products and how is the process.

Just like today. I just went to see our s…

Genting Trip Part 2

I promised photos but after posting them up in friendster, i really super lazy to post it up here le. If you guys wanna see it then go view my friendster ok? Sorry la...

This is my friendster web address.

Overall, the genting trip had been pretty fun. Will probably be going again soon. This time, i'll just stay in the casino. Lol...

I'm in a pretty happy mood because i got my confirmation letter and an increment to go with it. Super happy!

Last night something happened. I was washing my face and when i look into the mirror, i saw 1 bloody big cockroach climbing on the tiles behind me.

The 1st thing i did was to call out for him to kill the pest. He took a roll of newspaper, went into the bathroom and "SMACK!"

For one moment, it felt as though my husband is back and we are a happily married couple but i know it's not true.

I felt that way for about 1 sec when i jolted back to reality again. He is gone. The husband that i love has al…

Genting Trip Part 1

Dear friends, i'm back! Do you guys miss me? I pretty much had fun playing the indoor and outdoor themepark and not to forget gambling at the casino.

Photos coming up on the next entry, that is if i have the time to upload. I promise i'll try if i'm not feeling too lazy.

Everything had been pretty much fine till the last day. I had a big quarrel with my mum and she just had to dig up my wound that i try so hard to conceal.

I cried all the way from genting back to singapore. Even when i reach home, i couldn't stop tearing. I couldn't sleep the whole night.

I try hard not to blame her but i gotta admit that till now, i am still unable to understand and accept why she would curse my marriage to fail.

And he who promises to prove her wrong did not keep to his promise. Is she any happier now that her curse came true?

All my nightmares are back again. When will i get over it again? Why does life have to be so difficult? I just wanna be happy.

I'm very tired of crying. It hu…

Angry? Happy? Sad?

So angry! I am so so so angry today. Don't wanna talk about it anymore. I hate people who always expects help from others but don't wanna help others.

Selfish la! Arghhhhh!!! I'm so angry plus i got drenched in the morning while going to work. But i'm not a person who hold grudges. I'll forget about it soon. Keke...

Woohoo! I'm also very happy. Counting down the days. 1 more day and off i go to have fun and leave this busy and sad world behind for 4 days.

Hope by the time i come back, i'll only be busy and not sad anymore. Actually, i stop feeling sad quite some time ago le.

But i'm afterall human ma. Once in awhile still will feel some emotions de. I'm not cold-blooded nor am i heartless ok?

Can't wait. Time pass by faster please. Therefore, dear friends if you are looking for me, i'll be back on sun night. Don't miss me too much. Lol...

May all the people i care about have an enjoyable weekend. Love ya guys! Muacks! Tata...

Feeling lousy...

Today a sudden surge of emotions overwhelmed me. Cried non-stop the moment i reached home.

Suddenly, i became vulnerable to every word said to me and action done to me. The sense of loneliness is killing me.

Does everybody have days like this too? I don't know. All i know is i feel damn lousy all of a sudden.

I will get over it i think. Maybe... I need a break.

Leave me alone...


One day a farmer's donkey fell down into a well. The animal cried
piteously for hours as the farmer tried to figure out what to do.
Finally, he decided the animal was old, and the well needed to be
covered up anyway; it just wasn't worth it to retrieve the donkey.

He invited all his neighbours to come over and help him. They all
grabbed a shovel and began to shovel dirt into the well. At first,
the donkey realized what was happening and cried horribly.Then,
to everyone's amazement he quieted down.

A few shovel loads later, the farmer finally looked down the well.
He was astonished at what he saw. With each shovel of dirt that
hit his back, the donkey was doing something amazing.
He would shake it off and take a step up.

As the farmer's neighbours continued to shovel dirt on top of the
animal, he would shake it off and take a step up. Pretty soon,
everyone was amazed as the donkey stepped up over the edge of
the well and happily trotted off!


Life is going to shovel dirt on you, …


No time to update. Very sorry to all my dear friends. Been really busy with work. Every night come home i already brain dead.

Work is fine. Life is pretty fine too i think. Work is slightly stressful and busy. Too many responsibilities.

It's good cause it keeps me busy and it just proves that i am capable of working compared to what some others that think likewise of me.

My manager dotes on me alot and i have a bunch of really nice and caring sales team. We are like 1 big family. No doubts there will be politics but everything is pretty much under control.

I just hope i can do my job well and don't get into any trouble. My manager expects alot from me and i don't wanna disappoint him.

My team are all depending on me to process their documents for them so no space for any mistakes to be made.

I've been feeling pretty sick recently. Sick of seeing and hearing things that i'm trying to avoid. Nah! I'm really feeling sick.

Some say i overwork but i think not. Maybe i'…

I'm touched...

I used to feel that when the elderly cares for you, it can be really irritating and annoying because all they do is nag and nag and nag. I really hate it but...

Only when you are down, they can feel it and they will be there for you though ultimately, we have to stand on our own feet because they won't always be there for me.

Now i truly know how it feels to have someone care for me when i thought i have lost everything. I begin to give up on myself.

But, they have never given up hope on me. They are always there silently watching over me. They don't say but they actually care. I feel really lucky to have them.

They watch me grow from a small little girl who has bad temper, unreasonable behaviour and a total spoilt brat to a more sensible human being.

They can sense when i'm upset and lost. They give encouraging words. They teach me the way of life. To think i used to find them a pain. Not anymore.

They are the treasure i never knew i had and i'm very touched by their action…

Let the rain wash everything unhappy away

Today i walked home in the rain. Heaven must have known that i was feeling upset and therefore sent this rain to wash away my pain.

I just realise that some of the memories that i treasure alot has been erased. It no longer exist in my life.

Yes... Fate has just played another joke on me. It hurts alot but it's not going to hurt long though it has once again open up a wound and left a scar in me.

Life has dealt me with many blows but i will learn to stand up again. I will pick myself up again.

I've been through the darkest moments in my life and i don't think anything can be worse than that. Though i have not walked out of it entirely yet but i think i can do it.

From that moment onwards, nothing and no one can bring me down again. As the rain lash onto my face and the cold wind blowing against my wet body, i did not feel cold at all.

The only thing that has gone cold is my heart. I teared for a moment and i told myself to be strong.

Some things are just not worth the effort anym…

You're My Sunshine!

You are my sunshine

My only sunshine

You make me happy when skies are gray

You never know, dear, how much I love you,

Please don't take my sunshine away.

The other night, dear, as I lay sleeping,

I dreamed I held you in my arms

You are my sunshine, my only sunshine.

Please don't take my sunshine away...

How i feel at times... Can you see it? Can you feel it?

Got all this from a good friend whom i think he would like his blog to be more low profile so i'm not gonna say who. Sorry i took this without your permission but it really fits how i feel at times and i think it's really cute...

Unique Flaws...

An elderly Chinese woman had two large pots, each
hung on the ends of a pole which she carried across
her neck.

One of the pots had a crack in it while the other pot
was perfect and always delivered a full portion of

At the end of the long walks from the stream to the
house, the cracked pot arrived only half full.

For a full two years this went on daily, with the woman
bringing home only one and a half pots of water.

Of course, the perfect pot was proud of its

But the poor cracked pot was ashamed of its own
imperfection, and miserable that it could only do half
of what it had been made to do.

After two years of what it perceived to be bitter failure,
it spoke to the woman one day by the stream.
'I am ashamed of myself, because this crack in my
side causes water to leak out all the way back to your

'The old woman smiled, 'Did you notice that there are
flowers on your side of the path, but not on the other
pot's side?'

'That's because I have always kn…

Who am i?

Been really busy working. So many things to do but i never seem to have enough time to do it all. No mind for blogging. I don't know what to write also.

I'm like a wandering spirit floating around with no certain place to call my own. Still learning to be a better person.

I'm slowly forgetting how he looks like. The more i try to remember, the more faded and blur is the image in my mind.

But i know that he still lives in my heart because i still do miss him and there will be the occasional heart pains.

Although i'm busy but my heart is lonely. He is always on my mind. I'm always wondering what he is doing. Did he take his lunch? Is he happy?

I miss talking to him on the phone. I even miss the times we quarrel over small little things. Whatever happened to us now?

I've been pondering on what actually happened. Everything happen so fast, i'm still having difficulty believing that all this has happened.

Why did he give up on me when we were so in love? Then i think o…

Looking back...

Looking back at our lives, we realise that we often do alot of foolish things. Some are worth laughing at and some makes us feel disgusted with ourselves.

Those were the days. The things that we do, we often feel we are damn right about it or it's downright funny at that point of time.

We never realise that the things we do often hurt alot of people around us. Humans are selfish creatures often thinking that we are always right.

I'm not a person that likes regrets in whatever i do but very often, i do things which i regret later and it's often too late to do anything to salvage the situation.

We can never turn back time. There are no time for regrets. Things happen for a reason and life goes on no matter what happens.

We can only learn from our mistakes and not commit it again. Things are just not gonna be the same again after the damage is done. The scar will always be there.

I don't know abt others and i have no right to judge others. I, myself often do alot of things to h…



A sick man turned to his doctor,

as he was preparing to leave the examination room and said,

"Doctor, I am afraid to die.

Tell me what lies on the other side."

Very quietly, the doctor said, "I don't know."

"You don't know?

You, a Christian man, do not know what is on the other side?"

The doctor was holding the handle of the door;

on the other side came a sound of scratching and whining,

and as he opened the door,

a dog sprang into the room

and leaped on him with an eager show of gladness.

Turning to the patient, the doctor said,

"Did you notice my dog?

He's never been in this room before.

He didn't know what was inside.

He knew nothing except that his master was here,

and when the door opened, he sprang in without fear.

I know little of what is on the other side of death,

but I do know one thing...

I know my Master is there and that is enough."

May today there be peace within you.

May you trust God that you are …


A boy was born to a couple after eleven years of marriage. They were a loving couple and the boy was the gem of their eyes. When the boy was around two years old, one morning the husband saw a medicine bottle open. He was late for office so he asked his wife to cap the bottle and keep it in the cupboard. His wife, preoccupied in the kitchen totally forgot the matter. The boy saw the bottle and playfully went to the bottle fascinated by its color and drank it all. It happened to be a poisonous medicine meant for adults in small dosages. When the child collapsed the mother hurried him to the hospital, where he died. The mother was stunned… She was terrified how to face her husband. When the distraught father came to the hospital and saw the dead child, he looked at his wife and uttered just five words.


1. What were the five words?

2. What is the implication of this story?

ANSWER: The husband just said 'I am with you Darling'
The husband's totally unexpected reaction is…

Happy 25th Birthday To Me!

The day i dread has finally came and gone. Today is a new beginning. I hereby wish myself Happily Living For Quarter Of A Century!

Thanks to all the friends who message me to wish me happy birthday though he wasn't 1 of them but i guess i should have expected it.

My colleagues all gave me a surprise! They treated me to KFC and they order it without me knowing. Very sweet of them and i thought nobody knows it's my birthday.

Thanks to my family for treating me to steamboat. Freaking bloated now. I think i ate till the food reach my throat liao.

I would also like to thank my mother-in-law though she doesn't read my blog. Thanks that she remembered my birthday and made the effort of boiling 2 hard boil eggs for me and gave me an ang pow.

It's some kind of tradition. Peeling the shell is like peeling all the bad things in your life and good things will come into your life. The amount doesn't matter. It's the thought that counts and i'm very much touched by her action…

10 Guidelines From God

Effective Immediately, please be aware that there are changes YOU need to make in YOUR life. These changes need to be completed in order that I may fulfill My promises to you to grant you peace, joy and happiness in this life. I apologize for any inconvenience, but after all that I am doing, this seems very little to ask of you. Please, follow these 10 guidelines
1. QUIT WORRYING: Life has dealt you a blow and all you do is sit and worry. Have you forgotten that I am here to take all your burdens and carry them for you? Or do you just enjoy fretting over every little thing that comes your way?
2. PUT IT ON THE LIST: Something needs done or taken care of. Put it on the list. No, not YOUR list. Put it on MY to-do-list. Let ME be the one to take care of the problem. I can't help you until you turn it over to Me. And al though My to-do-list is long, I am after all... God. I can take care of anything you put into My hands. In fact, if the truth were ever really known, I take care of a lot of things for you …

Forget everything...

1 more week before i turn 25. Damn! Time flies by so fast. Better happily enjoy this last precious week while i'm still 24.

I feel so tired. Work is busy. No time to for anything else. Plans for studies are already on my mind. Hope everything goes smoothly.

Now is a good time to forget everything. Forget all unhappy and painful memories. Forget him. Forget myself. Forget my past life.

Something funny happen today while i'm having lunch. A butterfly came flying towards me while i'm eating.

It's pretty weird to see a butterfly at that hour of time and some more at coffeeshop lor. Then keep flying to my face.

My HR manager chase it away but it made 1 big round back at me again. I don't remember offending any butterflies leh.

Although i love butterflies la but i so scared it will land on my head. I confirm will go mad la. Lucky that didn't happen la. All it did was fly around me.

My HR manager say it must be attracted by some kind of smell. I told him i got no BO lor so d…
Many things have been happening lately till i feel total lost and not knowing what to do. I have already cleared my thoughts and now i know which direction to go.

I hope and believe that i'm making the right choice. May what i decide bring me the peace i want. I'm tired of thinking and feeling miserable.

Someone once told me that all good things will come to an end. There are no banquets that will never end. Tomorrow will just be another brand new day.

Believe that God has his plans for me. Just follow my heart and listen to him. He will lead me to happiness. I really wanna believe in that and i will.

I may have lost the battle now but i won't lose forever. I will stand up stronger and better than before because i know where my weaknesses are.

God will be with me no matter where i am. He will walk side by side with me when i'm strong and carry me when i'm weak. I have nothing to fear. AMEN!

Work has been busy. Been out on the field with my sales people understanding how …

Letting go is tough...

Daddy has already gone back and tomorrow is a beginning of my new job and life. I'm feeling nervous. Somehow sadness overwhelms that feeling.

Letting go is a tough and painful process especially your loved ones but in life, we do encounter such setbacks but we just have to learn to let it go.

There is no point in holding back to something which no longer belongs to you. It'll only make you and your life more miserable.

He wants to go, so i give him his freedom. It wasn't easy and it nvr will be. That doesn't mean i love him any lesser.

I will always love him. He will always be in my heart. I just want him to be happy. I just want to see him smile again.

If fate allows and we are meant to, we will be together. I don't wanna think so much anymore. Let him fly and find the happiness that he wants.

I'll give him my blessings when the time comes. I can only pray to God to give me the strength to carry on and peace to be in my heart.

Now i can only focus on myself to become…

Everything will be fine...

Life has not been exactly good for me. I still miss me him alot and the pain in my heart just won't go away.

I've been hurt pretty badly but i'm not complaining because i hurt him 1st and how much i regretted it.

I feel pretty miserable at times and tears just flow from my eyes. People who hate me will be happy to know that.

I'm thankful that a bunch of long lost friends actually called up on me and shower their care and concerns on me.

I also know that God will always be there for me no matter what happens. I pray to him faithfully everyday.

I trust that he will slowly take my pain away and heal my wounds. I will stand up and be strong again.

I've found a job as a Sales and Marketing Coordinator. Starting next tues and dad is coming back tomorrow until mon.

Everything will be fine i believe.

I will take this opportunity to understand myself and where i went wrong. I've learnt to see things in a more open heart.

It might not always be other people's fault. Sometimes…


One night a man had a dream, He dreamed he was walking along the beach with the Lord. Across the sky flashed scenes from his life. For each scene, he noticed two sets of footprints in the sand: one belonging to him, and the other to the Lord.
When the last scene of his life flashed before him, he looked back at the footprints in the sand. He noticed that many times along the path of his life there was only one set of footprints. He also noticed that it happened at the very lowest and saddest times in his life. This really bothered him and he questioned the Lord about it. "Lord, you said that once I decided to follow you, you'd walk with me all the way. But I have noticed that during the most troublesome times in my life, there is only one set of footprints. I don't understand why when I needed you most you would leave me."
The Lord replied, "My precious child, I love you and I would never leave you. During your times of trial and suffering, when you see only one set of footprints, it was then…

Im free!

Yesterday, i was finally allowed to go back and collect my belongings and paycheck from that stupid place.

Some of my things were missing and my pay kena cut like don't know what and delay my pay somemore but i don't care anymore.

I have no time to argue with small and petty people. Got better things to do than waste my breath on them.

Most importantly is i no longer have anything to do with them and that place anymore. Woohoo! So so so happy la!

Been sick since last thursday till now. Stupid fever, headache, body ache, flu, cough and sore throat. Torture me till now.

Why must i be so so so sick la? Sick until i go interview also scared i faint on the road. Very weak lor. Sianzzz...

Been to many interviews but no results. I will not lose heart because God will open a road for me. Any place beats being in that lousy place agreed?

Btw, whatever happened to all my haters? Disappear from the earth already ar? Kena badly wounded by my army izzit?

Bwahahaah! Serves you people right for curs…
It's been a week since i signed the papers. I won't say i'm very happy but i'm not that sad either.

It's over! I got my freedom back though not exactly what i wanted but God has a plan for me i believe.

What's with all the remarks on the tagboard? Are you guys the dogs of hers too? I am appalled at the amount of dogs she keep.

She doesn't feed you guys so u guys are damn hungry now is it? Anyhow bark. Whatever i've written here is my problem.

Don't get my family involved or the same thing will happen to your families too. I think you guys are simply pathetic.

Why don't you guys go lick somebody's arse since you are so hungry. The person may decide to give you some shit to eat.

It's ok to build your happiness on my misery la. I'm fine with it. Gotten so used to it already. I'm just glad i made some idiots happy. =)

Thanks for building up on my blog traffic. Totally appreciate that. Sorry to say that i'm closing it down soon.

All the t…

My BOSS is a F**king CB!

My dear friends, sorry for disappearing for so long. Im fine! Don't worry abt me.

Life has never been better for me. I have not enjoyed life in such a long time.

It's great to be single again. No worries abt anything. Just living my life to the fullest i can.

The only fucking problem i have is my job. I'm no longer working there anymore so pls don't go there find job liao. Look for other agencies.

I like very long never complain liao. What is my blog for man? I'm gonna COMPLAIN!!!

My cb boss is really a fucking cb bitch lor.

She always think she damn fucking smart like that. Nobody can be smarter than her. Think she so good in talking then cannot tahan people talk better than her.

Super knn la. 40 over years old liao still think like a fucking small kid.

She is the most cb, most lamest boss i've ever seen. I swear i will never work for a woman again.

Never! Not for the fucking rest of my whole life if i can help it.

Sorry ar! Abit vulgar this entry. I cannot control la. …

A lesson to learn

How to hold your temper
NAIL IN THE FENCE Make sure you read all the way down to the last sentence. (Most importantly the last sentence)

There once was a little boy who had a bad

His Father gave him a bag of nails

and told him that every time he lost his
temper, he must hammer a nail into the back of the fence.

The first day the boy had driven 37 nails into the fence. Over the next few weeks, as he learned to control his anger, the number of nails hammered daily

gradually dwindled down. He discovered it was easier to hold his temper than to

drive those nails into the fence. Finally the day came when the boy didn't

lose his temper at all. He told his father

about it and the father suggested that the

boy now pull out one nail for each day that he

was able to hold his temper.

The days passed and the young boy was finally able to tell his father that all the nails were gone. The father took his son by the

hand and led him to the fence. He said, 'You

have done well, my son, but look a…


Dear all,

I would hereby like to announce that i will most probably stop blogging.

Please ignore all the previous post in this blog about my parents-in-law. They are great people. I only said all the bad things in a moment of anger.

All those things are written by a spoilt brat and she no longer exist. The old Sheila is gone from this world. Eliminated from my life forever.

Here lies a heart-broken and humble girl who just want to change for the better. To be a better wife, daughter-in-law and as a human being as well.

It's never too late to start learning. The important thing is that i'm willing to learn and now i can only learn thru the hard way.

I can only depend on myself now. I need lots of support. I may continue to blog but it'll be as a brand new person so it'll be quite some time before i blog again.

If you're here to help, i welcome you. If you're not, i still welcome you but don't give any unnecessary comments.

Till we meet again dear friends. I'm go…

Heart broken...

I'm sick and tired of people asking me what happen and if i'm ok anot.

It's kinda obvious abt what happen isn't it?

Want to know right? Ok! Fine! My husband wants divorce me ok? I'm not going into details because i don't wanna talk abt it anymore!

Go on... Laugh at me... Laugh at emo, pathetic Sheila.

So it's pretty obvious that i'm NOT ok! I'm upset. I can't stop crying when i'm all alone at night.

I nvr reply messages and answer calls is very obvious that i'm not in the mood to talk or discuss abt my current situation.

I'm not trying to be emo here so stop saying i'm being emo! If you're not here to console me then don't talk to me at all!

I'm heart broken! Not emo at all! My heart is breaking into small little pieces and i can't breath anymore...

I've lost whatever strength i have left in me. I'm like a bird being trapped in a cage not knowing what to do. To struggle is futile.

Nothing is settled until he comes …


You said if i really love you i should let you go.

I just want you to be happy from the bottom of my heart.

So i shall grant your request and let you go.

I pray that you will be happy in every single day of your life.

There will be no more updates.

Sheila is gone from this world.

She is as good as dead. Goodbye dear friends!

Thank you for the support shown.


So damn fucking unlucky this week.

Had a quarrel with deardear abt his mother and he got angry with me when i am suppose to be the 1 to get angry. I hate him!

On thursday, my mind was full of the quarrel that when i went to the ATM to withdraw money, i actually remember to take my card but forget to take the money.

$50 just gone like this. Whoever the lucky chap it is that took my money, may your hands rot and fingers start dropping like a leprosy patient!

Today, my parents had a quarrel again. My mum really force my father up the wall this time and made him made up his mind to divorce.

I had to talk my father round for her but what did i get? Nothing! More insults from her instead! Just because my father favour and dote on me the most!

Is that a sin?

Why can't she dote on me just like my father do? Why must she get jealous over her own daughter? Just what did i do wrong?

I cannot take it anymore! I tried to talk her round and she say she don't have a daughter like me and that i side …


On a dark & lonely night when everyone's asleep,

Creatures of the dark arise from their sleep... Mouth watering for food and blood...


I'm talking about Zombies!

They are nothing like the normal humans moving slowly with blood in their mouths. Instead, they look more like deformed human wolf...

They are the fast moving type and they are out pounding the streets looking for their next victim...

Pounding along the streets, they found their victim. A lady all alone with a cigarette in her hand.

Licking their lips, they dash towards their victim. As they got nearer, i realise that i AM that lady they were going after!

My heart stopped for a moment... My next instinct told me to run for it. I turned the other direction and started running for my life.

I had a few near miss and almost ended up getting caught by them. I was beginning to run out of breath. They are nearing on me...

My legs couldn't carry me any further. They were too fast for me. They caught up with me and i stopped…

Start of my lonely lonely nights...

Before i start on, i have a few really really late updates which happened like 2 weeks ago? Erm... I finally found time to blog abt it la can anot?

Remember i was saying how boring it is and that there's nothing to blog abt at all 2 sundays ago? My sister made something happen so i can blog abt it.

She got into an accident which made the family Toyota Vios look like this....

For some retards out there, of cause my sister didn't really do it intentionally so that i can blog la! And obviously it wasn't her fault! Please don't be so idiotic.She damn poor thing lor. Was all alone when the thing happened. Luckily, there was a guy who was willing to be her witness.My sister was already halfway into the carpark and people who are in their parking lots should let the car go 1st before coming out from their lot right?Chee bye lorry driver saw the car coming still insist coming out from the lot. You think your fucking lorry very small izzit?Guess what was the injury done to the lor…